Yeah, I asked myself the same question!
I have been thinking about creating online content for a long time now. I tried to ignore the idea but it keeps getting back into my mind.
But then, there are also those little voices of self-doubt and self-questioning saying: Do you think you know enough stuff to be sharing it with people? Do you think that you can really write? (you that have been so used to swiping up on social media, that you don’t even watch a video that has more than three minutes). Will you be that patient to consistently keep posting content online? And then, even if you do who is gonna read that thing? Oh well, I know, maybe no one, or maybe just three or four of your friends, who will only do it so they can make fun of your writing skills and your shitty ideas. Seriously, who the hell do you think you are to help people who don’t even know you? Uuuugh, I hate those annoying noises, but they kept appearing in my head every now and then for almost a year now.
Some ego food wouldn’t hurt anybody, right?
But to be fair to my brain (I would never do anything without you little friend! Seriously, I couldn’t even if I wanted to), I would sometimes get some ego-boosting ideas.
It would mostly happen during days where I am super confident and positive and all. Days where I may have said something in a meeting that everybody agreed on and cheered me or, or maybe I wrote a report and got amazingly positive feedback, or I did a presentation and people came to me afterward to thank me for the excellent presentation, complimented me on my content and my speaking skills, etc.
You have those days and you think: I’m on fire today! Or you think alright, maybe I’m not as bad as I thought I were after all.
Am I good enough to be a reference?
Anyways, so apparently, some people like my analyzing skills, my way of thinking, my writing, my speaking, but I had a hard time believing that! Partly because of my overthinking (as some of my friends would say) or what some people would call perfectionism, or maybe just because of a lack of self-confidence.
Yes, self-confidence is a big issue and we all experience it (We’ll talk more about it in a future post). But guess what? These thoughts are totally normal! It is just my brain trying to make me stay in my comfort zone, where there are no threats to my existence, my ego, or my emotions. It is just my brain trying to “protect” me from doing something that can cause me “pain”. It’s actually amazing how our brains work! Isn’t it? I don’t know about you but I love reading about neuroscience and understand how does this little friend we have inside our skull affects every single aspect of our lives! Ok, more about that later, let’s focus on what we’re talking about now.
So, when I learned that those feelings and thoughts are perfectly normal, I have to say I was so relieved. It helps to know that I am not the only one with that issue, to be honest with you. A lot of people are dealing with self-confidence issues and it can have such an impact on our lives if we don’t control it correctly, it can make us lose opportunities because we think that they are too good to be true, it can make us go into destructive and toxic relationships because we believe that we don’t deserve any better, lose our jobs or a friend, etc.
All I wanted to say is that I’m a perfectly sane person (well, maybe not perfectly but mostly), that I am working on my self-confidence issues and things are getting better for me. A big part of the work I’m doing is just accepting my weaknesses; trying to face them and working on them gradually without any sense of shame nor guilt. Another very important part is to know that there is NO WAY that I will be likable to everybody and meet everybody’s expectations. It is impossible, so to me, as long as I am accepting myself exactly the way I am, I shouldn’t really care about what other people say (notice I said “shouldn’t” not “don’t”, Well, I said I’m working on it I didn’t say I got there already LOL). Anyways, I’ll share some valuable lessons I learned along the way about self-confidence, as well as my personal experience on another blog post inshallah. So, STAY TUNED!
To be continued
Until then, stay blessed!